Chihuahua world invaded by the visiting “critters”

May 26, 2011 § 2 Comments


Wow! I think the coast is clear!! The visiting “critters” are gone and my world getting is back to normal now. I had heard mama talking for weeks about some “nephew” thingies coming to our house, and something called “babysitting” that she couldn’t WAIT to do. Sounded kinda fun, but I had NOOOOO idea my world was about to …

I tell you it was like an invasion from outer space! They came with all these strange contraptions I’d never seen before – inflatable beds (very unstable if you ask me, I rolled right off!), inflatable bathtubs, an all-terrain vehicle called a “stroller” (watch out!), and a throne/mission control seat referred to as the “high chair.” From this “high chair” whenever the nephew “called,” all my peeps would scramble to serve and bring him food offerings. He seemed to be the one in charge of this whole takeover.

And you tell me. How come when they make stinky “presents” for Mama she laughs and plays with them while she cleans that up? She doesn’t think my surprises are that funny and cute! And trust me those were some real stiiiiiiinkers! The whole house smelled funky. What ARE those guys eating?!?!

Oh, and the apparent mind control power that those “nephews” have over my humans was unbelievable!! None of my favorite and usually fail-proof tricks seemed to work to gain me some attention, chicos. Oh no, no, no. They were all too busy chasing after those critters – playing with their toys, feeding them funny smelling “formulas” (that must be their secret power potion), giving them baths and talking in some strange language called “baby talk.” I have enough troubles trying to decipher human lingo. Now I was really lost.

And as for my Mama’s lap … GONE!!! Or should I say permanently occupied! Mi casa is NOT su casa, amigos!!

But the worst was the sleeping arrangements. No one seemed to be in their proper beds – my girl was on a couch, my boy on the other sofa and Mama kept changing rooms and going to sleep with the wiggly critter nephews. And I was unceremoniously shooed out of the rooms and left to sleep on the doggie bed! What?!?! No warm Mama to cuddle with?! Noooooooooooo …

Well, now they have moved on to the next part of their “visit” – the beach. I mean the nephew critters were cute – giggles, squeals and all – but I need my planet back to normal – where I am the princess AND in charge! Hrmph!! Mama was a little sad when they left, but I was not entirely sorry to see their humans come back to get them and ALL their gear. Heh, heh, their mothership was bursting at the seams when they pulled away.

I managed to take a picture before they blasted away so I could report them to NASA. You be on the lookout, amigos!!

Mama's nephews

The Chihuahua questions the quirks of fate

April 7, 2011 § Leave a comment


Cranky Chihuahua Exhibit A - Yesterday's meeting with Guinness the lab

Mama says I’m kinda cranky. She has actually accused me of being anti-social. I say, nay! I only feel the urge to bark annoyingly at bigger … I mean taller dogs. Those show-offs who like to lumber about and outpace me when they walk around MY neighborhood. I’m very outgoing, friendly and curious with fellow petites. But I don’t like to upset Mama or let her down. So I thought I’d dig deep into my psyche (though I realize this could take quite a while considering the enormity of my intellect) and honestly examine my seemingly fickle motivations.

Is my height a funny joke by the masters of fate. Was I intended to be as mighty as a lion? As noble a beast as a horse? Or as fearsome and awe-inspiring as a bear? Well, I certainly feel that way! Don’t get me wrong. I know and appreciate that I AM a perfect, if diminutive work of art. A marvel of precision and efficiency in machinery. A wonder of high technology.

But then I thought … could it be that I am really resentful about my “shortcomings”? Eeeeek, could I actually be feeling threatened? Am I just insecure and a bit jealous of other canines who might be trying to catch my Mama’s eye?

But no, Chicos! It isn’t like that!! I INSIST I am a champion of justice – descendant from a long line of fierce royal guard dogs. Like my forefathers, I am merely accustomed to the proper homage that my familia has been receiving since the time of the mighty Mayans. For goodness sake, Chicos! We guarded kings and queens of incredible civilizations, patrolled the inexplicable New World pyramids! Those catos and jackals once revered in Egypt’s pyramids toooootally lost their cool with the end of the pharaohs, while we remained members of royal families around the world for centuries to come. Chihuahuas are just looking for some modern-day respect.

Once I get a little respect, we all understand each other

Mama, to you I say, I am just misunderstood. I am simply proud and in charge! And any inconsistencies in my behavior are to remind others of my honorary stature. And because I like to keep all my peeps guessing – it adds to the mystery that is me and the effectiveness of my surveillance techniques.

So take any complaints to the BIG Guy upstairs. He knew what he was doing when he made me 😉

Chihuahua ears are a very effective high-technology, home defense system (no jokes, please!)

April 2, 2011 § Leave a comment


Like all good chihuahua security agents, I don’t like loud noises (except those that I make!) Mama wonders if this is because of the swiveling “radar dishes” on top of our heads we refer to as ears. Being that I can hear a crumb drop on the kitchen floor from any room in the house, I’m pretty aware of all noise disturbances within my domain. She believes I am a little over sensitive. I’m just doing my job as high-tech, official protector of the household and its peeps.

Let me tell you about some of the worst offenders in my barrio:

GRRrrrr! In the ring, it is Chanel the Terror vs the creaky ironing board!

Take the vacuum cleaner – nasty, beastly contraption! I’ve explained my strong objections to its weekly appearances in MY house.

And don’t get me started on Mama’s espresso maker. We have nicknamed it The Dragon because it huffs and puffs scary steam and it is a formidable opponent that I must face every morning before I get my breakfast Cheerios. Not so good when the rest of the peeps want to sleep in. But I must do my job.

UGH! Then there is the 25-year-old-but-seldom-used-so-it-is-still-around ironing board that Dad insists on bringing out every once in a while. When he opens up it up, I MUST go berserk and defend my peeps from that screechy nuisance. I make mucho growling threats, get my hackles up (all the way down to my tail!) and run back and forth on the back of the couch (my official guard dog station) barking like the great threatening force that I am. The noise from this confrontation gets fierce, which makes Daddy yell and scream too. I guess I’m not scoring points with him on this either. Thankfully because Mama says ironing is against her religion, she doesn’t have witness this spectacle. But when things settle down and Dad finally gets to iron his dress shirts, all that remains of the commotion is him mumbling and grumbling funny things while I snort and walk away in victory.

As you can see, I am usually proud and in charge.

photo: tampabay.com

But this week I met my match!  We had some MAJOR storms go through our neighborhood – BIG thunder, hail, scary wind, sideways rain even tornadoes in some places nearby. Needless to say I was NOT a happy camper. I must admit I hid under the covers with our boy who was home during the day. And once Mama got home from work, I climbed on to her lap, gazed intently into her eyes for soothing. And though I kept one ear attuned to her, the other remained tuned in to all the crazy noises outside. Mama said I looked a little off kilter, in a Picasso kind of way.

Thank goodness Florida weather changes fairly quickly and we are now having a nice sunny weekend. And speaking of Picasso, we are headed to the much-anticipated Paws for the Arts event!! I will post a picture of my master creation when I come back. And maybe a photo or two. If you happen to be in Tampa Bay, do come out and join me!! And if you are not, enjoy some happy Saturday Pet Blog Hopping! Hasta luego, chicos!

Chihuahua vision

January 12, 2011 § Leave a comment


In keeping with the positive thoughts and hopes for the new year, Mom decided to work on something called a “vision” poster. I didn’t really know what it was all about, but I figured I’d get into this arts and crafts project with her so we could spend some quality time together. Besides, Mom seemed kind of excited about it, and in my world this level of excitement is usually associated with food, so I thought there might be something yummy in it for me.

So I used my mind-reading powers on her and picked up some bits and pieces. I think you’re basically supposed to think about things that you would like to see happen in your life — dreams, wishes, goals. Then you find pretty peeeeectures of those things in magazines, cut them out and put together a “big” picture to inspire you. Oh, my chicos, I could soooooooo get into this!!

So while Mom was day dreaming about spending more time with the family, world travel and having her own creative freelance business, I thought up some grand ideas of my own:

1. I wanted to start by wishing for happy homes for all my pet amigos out there who need families. I’m a very lucky, Chica. Friends, if you don’t have a pet in your life, consider pet adoption – I promise it will be an awesome journey on a two-way street full of love. Let’s all help spread the word.

2. Then, rather than chasing the fountain of youth, I’d like to look into a fountain of perpetual Cheerios. Just imagine it — beautiful golden Cheerios raining down on me … cascading … sprinkling through the air. What a beautiful vision indeed. Maybe there could even be one in every home. Now, wouldn’t that make the world a better place 😉

3. Next, I figured I could use a jet-setting, special Chihuahua passport so I can travel with Mama. If she’s looking to have more travel in her life, this Princess needs her proper documentation. I no likey when she has to leave me behind. Ugh, shudder at the thought. And besides, I’d love to be able to visit some of my facebook friends from all over the world. Oh, and of course, I’ll be needing some matching luggage then.

4. It would be simply lovely to have my own massage therapist. Well, actually just Mom as my dedicated belly and noggin scratcher. All this exciting new creative work in her life will mean I have to share her attention. In my perfect world, Mom would have assistants to type up our blog posts, work on our social outreach and help with the production of her other works and designs. Maybe we could get one of those nice iPads to oversee things while she and I snuggle comfortably on the couch. Ooooo, ooooo, and we could also use it to Skype with our kids when they are off to college. I’d really like that. I miss our chicos too much.

5. OK, so I have to include one guilty pleasure — maybe just a leeeetle bliiiiiiiiiing!!!! And of course, muchos haute couture pretty dresses for the Chica to accessorize.

6. Finally, I can picture stardom in my life. SERIOUSLY!! All this cuteness can no longer be kept a secret. This Princess was NOT meant to remain an undiscovered treasure. It is Hollywood for me, Baby!

OK, that sounds about right to start the year. But I of course reserve the right to upgrade. Heh, heh. Now here is my fabulous masterpiece. What do you think?

Hey! How come the pesky Chihuahua gets all the attention now?!?!?

June 13, 2010 § 1 Comment


Tigger the cat is not sure what he thinks of his Chihuahua sister

Tigger the cat is not sure what he thinks of his Chihuahua "little sister"

I’m not too sure about this arrangement. Before my so-called “little sister” came along, I got all the lap time, the belly scratches, the adoring kisses, and the morsels when turkey sandwiches were being made. Now this yippy (yes, though mom would deny it, I think my pesky sister is yippy!) intruder is trying to usurp my throne! Hey! I AM the king of this jungle, kid!!

“Yip, yip,” and she gets taken out. “Yip, yip, yip,” and she gets fed. “Yip, yip, whine, whine,” and she gets treats. It is only Cheerios which I’d hardly consider edible, but it is the notion that irks. Oh, and one whimper, and it is all the belly rubs, she wants!!!

And with all the attention this pest is getting, my all-powerful silent stares just don’t have the irresistible manipulative effects they once had. They have lost some of their umph! Don’t mess with the master, chiquita! For now, just know I’m keeping my eye on you, sneaky one. You will fall!!

Tigger, aka Señor Gato and Chanel the Chihuahua's big brother

What did I do to you to deserve a Chihuahua?

But, worry not, my feline enthusiasts, in the meantime I think I may have stumbled upon something to re- establish some order around here. If I position myself just right between her and the way to mom’s bedroom, I can make her shake and whimper. He-he!! I don’t have to do another thing, just be my imposing self and lay there “innocently.” Ha!! She has to call Mom to come and get her (picture my evil gloat here!) You’d think she was expecting a surprise attack or something, wink, wink.

I told you, chica. Don’t get too comfortable. You know what they say out there in the wild, “just when you least expect it … EXPECT IT!!!!

I have telepathic powers

February 21, 2010 § Leave a comment


So mom DID go out of town and left me behind. But I’m getting even. I’m whinning telepathically. Can you hear me now?

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